End of Season BBQ Colts (Mr. Lawman’s Baa-Baas) 27 – Coaches Invitation Side 17

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Colts, Just before you read the report – I would like to wish you all the very best for the future!

Those of you who have exams – good luck and I hope you get the grades you are looking for. Those of you off to uni, have a fabulous time and don’t forget you are always welcome down at the club at weekends or during the hols! (Although you do need to be registered for insurance reasons! - let me know if you want me to sort anything out for you!)
Those of you who are still going to be around – I look forward to seeing you play for next season’s Colts or the Seniors! Enjoy!

It’s been an absolute pleasure to be one of your spectators, help manage you, write your match reports, go on tour with you and have the odd drink (and OMG even a dance with you!!!) over the years! I wish you all the best.

Deb xx

End of Season BBQ Colts (Mr. Lawman’s Baa-Baas) 27 – Coaches Invitation Side 17

The End of Season BBQ was reaching its final phase, the Founders Tag Festival had been thoroughly enjoyed, awards had been given, there had been a lot of fun and laughter, lovely burgers …. So what more could we possibly have to look forward to …..

The Colts (Mr. Lawman’s Baa-Baas) vs Coaches’ Invitation Side!

The Coaches were meticulous in their timing – turned up, changed and ready for action – it looked like the final campaign of the Crusaders as they marched on to the pitch carrying the flags (some of them were definitely old enough to be considered as Crusaders! Certainly they looked a motley crew!) The Colts were still lolling around in the car park.

The Coaches began their warm up – a lot of noise, a lot of steam, a lot of guffaws – not much running – cunning plan – save your energy! The Colts had just about managed to find the changing rooms.

The warm up continued – a lot of manoeuvres, arm up here, little hop there, bit of a stretch – nothing too taxing – they have to be careful at their age! But shock, horror! There were a couple of ringers! Young ones, those with hair, no wrinkles or beer bellies. What could this be? Had the Coaches finally conceded that they needed a little bit of pace to help them round the pitch? The ref (‘all hail the mighty Mr. Marshall’) certainly didn’t seem to be bothered about checking their credentials – didn’t think anyone under 40 could play for the Coaches? Obviously wrong on that point.

Anyway, the minutes had gone by, the hours had gone by, the sidelines were filling with spectators and the Colts began to emerge from the changing rooms – suitably oiled, tanned , hair gelled and attired they strolled on to the pitch. Warm up? Nah they’re far too fit to need one! Did we espy a couple of ex-Hitchin Colts? Oohh it was certainly a chance to spot the Celebrity! The gentlemanly core were there again, of course, with a delicate peppering of U17s who were definitely up for the challenge!

The battle lines were drawn up. Lots of flexing of muscles on the Coaches’ side (hard to spot from the side lines) and lots of strutting and posing on the Colts’ side (definitely visible from the side lines). The ladies began to swoon!

They were off! Both sides went straight into attack – there was no holding back. The war cries went up (well it was grunting on the Coaches’ side), the Colts were fleet of foot but the Coaches had quite a bit of strength in their forwards (weight really rather than strength). A nice take of the ball by Will Jay led to a good run down the pitch a beautiful off load to Jesse who ran straight through the middle of the Coaches to score in the corner.
5 – 0

Now this had been far too hasty for the majority of people both on and off the pitch. The spectators had barely introduced themselves and commented on the weather and the players hadn’t had a chance to even draw breath – let alone sort their positions out – mind you I don’t think they really managed that all match!

Poor Will Jay was injured – we hope you are on the mend Will! We wish you better!

The game took off again and a lovely bit of play ended up with Yusef running the sidelines and almost scoring in the corner but Mr. Frisch who had been very carefully watching the touch line did spot Yusef’s little toe go over the line – unfortunately the video ref was unavailable (something to do with a pint in the bar) – by this time the Coaches had caught up with play and found themselves defending vigorously (!) – the Colts flexed their muscles, the Coaches wobbled their beer bellies! Mr. (Mark) Taylor’s comment was that they were looking a tad tired.

The play rolled around the pitch – noticeable elements of excellent play from both sides – there was a lovely pick up of the ball from Nuts that had the spectators gasping in amazement and a nifty little try for the Marvel resulting from some good running play by the Colts.
10 – 0

Barely a chance to applaud before this was speedily followed by a Celebrity big run the length of the pitch from one of the Colts’ guest players a lovely side stepping, dodging run resulting in a try under the posts.
17 – 0

Dare I mention at this point that, for those of you who have not yet picked up on it, the Colts were not converting their tries – either to do with the fact that they were giving the Coaches a fighting chance or that they were having to convert their own …… bit of kicking practice in the offing I feel!

There were some demon tackles being made and a few of those Coaches were being targeted – reprisals for all those sit-ups – revenge for all that fitness training Mr. Panter and that dubious reffing Mr. Taylor (James variety)? Goodness knows what the senior Messrs. Jeffries and King had done to deserve such a tirade of tackles! According to Mr. Jeffries Senior, Martin definitely had it in for him (think this was just a game avoidance issue!) It was obvious that Messrs. Thorpe, Rushbrook, Jeffries Junior, Frisch Junior, Bolter and Lawman also had a few scores to settle and it was delightful to see Mr. King Junior as Jumping Jack Flash in the lineout. Mr. Jeffries Junior and Mr. Shaw were seen competing for the final of Strictly Come Dancing – what a lovely pair. And there was another try for the Colts (I’m not sure if this was Nuts or Asbo or both perhaps it was a quick double score!) Sorry! I was distracted at that point as we hunted high and low for the Colts’ water bottles only to find that they’d left them in the kit store (now you know why you need a coach to organise you!)
22 – 0

At this stage the Coaches had a better measure of the game, experience does tell at times you know, and anticipating the Colts’ runs the Coaches managed to make available space for one of their ringers to nip through and score. Well done James Coughlan (I believe!) At this stage I was distracted again organising oranges for my boys for half time!
22 – 5

Mrs. Thorpe was sent on a search for water – divining rod in one hand and wine glass in the other. She does have a knack for finding liquid but it usually is of the Sauvignon Blanc flavour. The Colts refreshed themselves with slices of orange, the Coaches moaned that it should be them that had the oranges. I pointed out that at least they were organised enough to have water bottles so should be quite content. At this stage also ‘all hail the mighty Mr. Marshall’ retired having worked his socks off with the Founders Tag Festival and tried to keep up with the Colts. He handed his whistle over to Security and Mr. Merritt took on the job with a lovely smile on his face!

Mrs. Thorpe was asked to remove her jugs from the pitch.

The second half started with a lovely kick and run from Mr. King Junior Jumping Jack Flash who scored a lovely try which was disallowed. Apparently the Colts had an extra man on the pitch – would Mr. Lawman allow such a thing to happen? The Coaches were awarded a penalty on the Colts’ 22 (took them ages to get there!) and despite some good defensive play and some cracking tackles by Mr. Frisch Junior, the Coaches managed to sneak in a lovely try. Well done Gary!
22-10

Unfortunately, Mr. Lawman had to depart the pitch having taken a nasty knock to the head! Definitely woozy, and finding it hard to focus he was unable to rejoin the game. His team though were determined to fight on without him and force a victory in his honour – whatever it took!!

Mrs. Thorpe demanded to know of her son what had happened to sublety – he was getting those tackles in, the opposition blanched in the face of such ferocity. Mr. Taylor was a definite target – and he wasn’t wearing his crash helmet – silly boy!

Some good attacking play and brilliant passing got the ball out on to the wing and Paul snuck in another try for the Colts.
27-10

Mr. Jeffries Senior was told to keep up with the play but his response was ‘Nah! It’ll come back in a minute!) It did! Mr. Merritt was very whistle happy but it was highly entertaining and gave the Coaches a chance to catch their breath. There was an awful lot of running. We weren’t quite sure if it was with the ball, away from the ball or away from the opposition but it kept them busy and happy for a while.

Mr. King Senior was spotted sunbathing at the bottom of a ruck, obviously needed a breather – he was trying to fight off his two sons!! There was some more good running both from the Colts and the Coaches with a couple of lovely dashes down the sidelines from Ziggy. A nifty ball to Joe enabled him to slide through and score for the Coaches in the last minute of the game, subsequently converted by himself! At least someone could kick!
27-17

The final whistle blew.

I’m convinced there were no dubious decisions and nor was there any cheating on either side…. Just a really good, fun game of rugby that had everyone smiling and laughing! The Colts flexed their pecks as they strutted back to the changing rooms, the Coaches looked a bit the worse for wear. Actually it was quite a hard game - both sides were in it to win but the youth won the day. Well done both teams – thoroughly enjoyable!

Deb xx

PS. Mr. Panter is starting fitness training this Sunday (18th May) at the Club at 10.30 a.m. in readiness for next season - all welcome!